I found this book on the side of the road in a box alongside the Gossip Girl book series and Confessions of a Shopaholic book series
I have mixed feelings about Mindy Kaling… I really want to like her and find her funny and I’m 100% rooting for her, but she just never does it for me
I figured I would give her another shot and she says in the intro it’s a quick read (see above) so I thought this was a great project for National Read a Book Day… that and stumbling across it on the side of the road felt a bit like a sign.
So I read it.
In one day.
I posted a Boomerang of it on Instagram and alluded to liking it and her and tagged her with hopes she would discover me and make me famous.
That didn’t pan out
So for the record the book sorta sucked
I’m a lackadaisical vegan, especially when it comes to some national food holidays that are just too annoying to reroute around
National Cheese Pizza Day was one such day so I just took it as it was.
This was mainly because we were in Kelowna where my uncle Bob, who’s famous on TripAdvisor for dropping so much wisdom in his reviews, claims has the best pizza in CANADA.
Yes, in ALL of CANADA
So we had to check it out
Bordellos was the place – an Italian restaurant with pasta, wood fired pizzas and pickle back shots on the menu. Classy
It was full of university aged kids with lip piercings and weird haircuts
We ordered the Margherita because that to me is a cheese pizza with a few leaves tossed on there. Totally counts.
There was a lot of hype over this pizza and it didn’t not live up to it
But we couldn’t figure out if it was the best pizza we’d ever had
This is because we really think all pizza is good
After my gruelling weekend of camper van drama, I was rescued by Meg and Ashley. They were able to cheer my up with a functioning air conditioned vehicle, craft beer and adventure, which included a trip to Kangaroo Creek Farm in Kelowna
Not usually one for animals in captivity, I threw morality out the window at the chance to see my first kangaroo as well as a chance to celebrate National Wildlife Day with pizazz!
This is Meg groping an emu
This is a kangaroo just hopping around
This is a kangaroo just lying around
This is me taking a selfie with a kangaroo
This is a kangaroo sitting like it’s on the cover of Sports Illustrated Swim Suit Edition
This is me getting on the level with the kangaroos
This is me continuing to be on the level with the kangaroos
This is me and some unknown creature that I let crawl on me
We then saw a guy wearing a confederate flag hat who had children and we were like what kind of fucked up zoo is this?? and left
But not without washing our hands 😉
National Pet Rock Day went as well as one would hope
I whipped out some rose quartz, some regular quartz and some chalcopyrite in hopes of giving my real pet some much needed company … as well as emitting equally as needed healing energy, as these particular healing stones are apt to do
Despite Rose Quartz’s ability to promote love and friendship, nothing seemed to jive
I’m not sure if there was some sort of communication barrier – they all are deaf…
In the end, Duncan ended up being a total Beyonce about everything and I had to put the gang away
Holy flippin’ National Tailgating Day
James and I took The Pickle to Kelowna for the long weekend in hopes of a peaceful and romantic weekend of touring vineyards and hanging out in the sun at the beach
L . O . L
What an absolute nightmare
The Pickle stalled at every stop and turn and caused us so much duress I ended up having night terrors for weeks to come (I’m not even being dramatic… the air con in the hotel we eventually had to book made similar kicking in and cutting out sounds as The Pickle and caused me to jerk out of bed in panic thinking I was stalled, yet again, in the middle of a high way intersection in 40 degree temperature, despite being chilled to the bone in my cushy 2 star hotel room)
Back to the tailgating… that just means drinking in/near a car right?
We did get to several vineyards through sheer will and determination so I feel we pulled that much off
We had many pitstops that involved oil and power steering fluid and first aid (Protip: don’t use a box cutter when enraged)
Also, let it be known, Kelowna is hot as hell, pretty much on fire and, although is considered ‘wine country’ (and thus would lead one to think refined and cultured), a city that would wear white Oakley sunglasses backwards on its head and drink Monster Energy drinks if it could
The weekend came to a dramatic finish with a final breakdown in the middle of an intersection and having to be pushed by strangers to a safe place to wait for a million dollar tow truck
For National Ginger Cat Appreciation Day, I couldn’t help but think to honour the most notorious lasagna eating ginger coloured cat of all, Garfield
(above: my favourite strip ever)
The only thing better than regular strength Garfield is Garfield Minus Garfield, a site dedicated to removing Garfield from the Garfield comic strips in order to reveal the existential angst of Jon Arbuckle.
So dark. So pure.
I decided to celebrate by busting out my Garfield onesie
I get a lot of cat calls when I wear this.. guess I’m asking for it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Trail mix: a hikers bff
Although a colossal fan of nuts, I am not keen on raisins or other dried up fruit. There is something inherently gross about the notion of letting fruit dry out to me.
So trail mix and I have a love/hate relationship
Well, rather, I have a love/hate relationship with trail mix… I’m sure trail mix doesn’t care about me one way or the other
I definitely love when there is chocolate in there. This particular mix was lacking but she did make a beautiful photo subject
Happy National Trail Mix Day !
National Toasted Marshmallow Day was brought to you by Dandie’s Vegan Marshmallows (that’s right, marshmallows have gelatine, a derivative of animal skin and bones *gag* and therefore are not vegetarian )
I was able to score a stick off the side of the road (if it wasn’t for the side of the road I wouldn’t have anything), poke a marshmallow on top and light ‘er up off my gas range oven… indoors!
She burned absolutely beautifully and tasted glorious
I kept it simple and ate it straight off the street stick. No regrets.
Months ago… which feels like years ago, I was walking Duncan along a the Arbutus Greenway where there lives a community garden. A place I always internally remark as a ‘thing I should do someday’ which I will never do.
There was a bin of sorts with a “Take as much as you like” sign on it and long branches and sprigs of bay leaf in it
I grabbed several stickfuls and brought them home and let them dry out
I’ve thrown them in soup, chilli, curry, and pasta …because I literally have no idea what they actually taste like and have thousands on hand
For National More Herbs Less Salt Day, I thought I’d bust them out and use them in the chilli I made as meal prep for the week that lay ahead
It went as usual, I threw them in the pot and the chilli tasted delicious. Who can say if it is the bay leaves, all or any of the other ingredients, or sheer talent ?
I also tried burning them as one burns sage or incense … and didn’t get much out of the ordeal
Totally “phoning this one in” as they say:
Here is Duncan, perched on the arm of the couch, and then digitally manipulated by an app to appear to be wearing this bright green bow tie.
It’s the best I could do, National Bow Tie Day, get off my back