Day 70 – March 11

National Submarine Day

This day started great! I had a meeting with my friends/counterparts in the Sarah’s Cards initiative, which you can read more about  here and here

There were some strong ideas and we made great plans for the future of the project.

The day ‘turned south’ as they say, when I got home from my meeting.
James had something he wanted to show me on his phone.

It was text from our Prostitenents BOYFRIEND.
She’s literally a zombie hooker from a B Listed Horror movie that just won’t die and keeps coming back for cheap frights

Just die, already K, please just die.

We had put the giant bag full of things she had left behind all throughout our house, out for her to pick up a couple days ago,  and she hadn’t come to get it. So James had sent a second text saying if it wasn’t gone by the end of the day (Day #2 of being outdoors), it was going to the dump.

She had scurried over at some point during the second day and fished through the bag, cherry picking a few items, and, like a classy, respectable 35 year old adult woman, left the rest on our property for us to deal with.

Then, as any other landlord would have done the very first day she left, we  threw the bag in the trash.
As insulted as we were by her behaviour, yet again, we honestly thought that was the end of that.

Of course naive fools were we, once more.

Her boyfriend was getting in touch because, even though we made it explicitly clear all her things were in that bag and we were going to toss it if it was was not taken within 24 hours, K was missing  a brand new Aldo purse that was left in a drawer.

Brazen. As. Fuck.

He even acknowledged that he knows we have blocked her phone number, that’s why he had to text us, and ended it with a ‘talk soon’.

L. O. L.

James responded that the purse in question was in the bag that she chose to rummage through and neglected to take in it’s entirety. We had warned it would be considered garbage and treated it as such.

“K, thanks.”
At least he’s polite.

The woman had 2 months to pack. This was 11 days after she moved out. She got her full damage deposit back despite our house being absolutely filthy and bearing several damages. She knew she was blocked and continued to harass us.  Why would she think, after everything, that she would be entitled to that purse anymore if we did still have it?

It is too bad because I didn’t realize she had been too damn stupid to take the brand new-still-with-tags purse when she came to rummage like a rat through the bag. I would have picked it out before heaving the bag out and sold it on Kijiji! Hopefully the garbage man spotted it and his wife  got a nice surprise (heteronormative, I know, I know… I just can’t see a gay garbage man’s husband liking that purse at all… although it was rather trashy 😉 )

I  can’t believe I’m as shocked as I am about this. It’s like I didn’t think she could creep lower as a person, but alas.

After responding to the crazy people as succinctly as possible via text, James and I headed out to Subway to celebrate National Submarine Day.
While we were there the winds pick up and up and up.


People couldn’t get the door open to Subway or even out of their cars. The power flickered and you could hear the howl.

On our drive home it looked like the traffic lights were going to fall any second and other motorists had windows blown out.
At home, the power was out and stayed out until early morning.

It was record breaking winds in the province, out-blowing our worst hurricane (Hurricane Igor). Winds were at 130kph and gusts were upwards of 180 kph. Roofs blew off houses and transport trucks fell over. Pedestrians were blown into traffic and the radio hosts passed on the warning to not leave the house unless absolutely necessary and to drive with both hands firmly on the wheel .


We spent the night listening to our hand crank radio by candlelight and laughing at the people who call in to complain.

My one regret was not just eating half of the sub and saving the other half for later – we don’t have any groceries and everything was closed !! Went to bed hungry but awoke to power, so small victories!

Happy National Submarine Day !! What a shit show!!







Day 69 – March 10th

March 10th was National  Blueberry PopOver Day

I was very tired this day – all the sadness of losing Melvin and drama of being landlord to a psycho, added to the time spent with my uber energetic twin nephews and multiplied by jet lag and alcohol consumption equated a bit of exhaustion.

I bought these things at the nearest grocery store

I thought they were pop overs but apparently they aren’t.

Popovers are airy rolls that puff up when baked, popping over the edge of the tin.

Oh well, close enough

They weren’t very good, for the record


Day 68 – March 9th

This was National Name Tag Day as well as National Get Over It Day!!

I tried to buy some name tags this day but Walmart didn’t have any and I was so annoyed by my whole ordeal I decided to just make my own.

Herman was a very willing and eager model… though he’s not an ambi-turner

I have no idea why Name Tag Day is a thing but Herman and I had a great time nevertheless.

The saga of our Prostitenant continued on today. She actually had the audacity to contact us and tell us to put a framed photo she left behind in a bag outside in the morning for her. She didn’t ask, she told us to. After the way she spoke to me back on the 1st. Nine whole days after her vacating our house. For the record, we have no legal obligation whatsoever to return anything left behind.

So James and I crafted a text that, although we knew would have no effect on her because of her raging narcissistic personality, allowed us to voice some of our grievances with her both as a tenant and as a human being.

It went like this:

Hi K,

This is why an official walk through is mutually beneficial to both parties.

I really didn’t appreciate being hounded for a damage deposit at my father’s wake last week. Landlords have 15 days to return damage deposits in NL.

I have reacted promptly to every issue that arose during your tenancy. I overlooked rent being late at least twice. We let you move in early and let you stay an extra day (should have been vacated Feb 28) even after you broke lease, without asking anything in return. You were not out on the morning of Mar 1 as you assured us you would be, which is what we arranged our limited time on that day around. 

Our house was not left in the condition we rented it to you (unclean, rip in living room sofa, long dent and scrape all along bedroom wall, multiple holes in upper hallway wall and living room, missing back door keys, the list could go on). A lesson hard learned on our end.

Your photo, along with all your other belongings that were left behind, were put outside today in the am in a recycling bag.

There is no need to respond. 

And with that we put everything she had left in our house (an entire blue recycling bag full of things)  out on our step (even though we have no obligation to return it, store it etc) and blocked her number from both our phones and Get Over it Day was celebrated. We hope to “get over” this nightmarish chapter of our lives!

I got to spend the day with the twins again – we went to some children’s programming at the provincial art gallery, lunch and swimming!

I got to see my old buddy and coworker Jason (Hi Jason!) and he gave me a sweet calendar a local artist, Anita Singh, made that lists all the holidays!

Day 67 – March 8th

March 8th of 2017 was designated Nation Registered Dietitian Nutritionist Day & Peanut Cluster Day.

This was relatively easy to celebrate- my little sister, Claire, is one of those!
(A Registered Dietitian Nutritionist, not a Peanut Cluster)

I had the great idea to ‘pay her back’ for the surprise package I had received on National Cereal Day from her with a bouquet of flowers or the like.

But when I went to look up florists in the where she lives, I got to thinking it would be way more fun to send her a pizza and beer and other junk food, for obvious reasons.

One of my really good friends, Craig, lives in the same town as my sister. When I got in touch to ask for his help,  he was more than willing. He even suggested getting a balloon and a card.

I also got it touch with Claire’s room mate to find out when she would be home and to help coordinate.

8 pm seemed like a safe time frame for Craig to come by with the surprise as far as the room mate knew

It didn’t quite work out time wise- Craig spent a lot of time in his car waiting and taking selfies.

But when he did get in her house and Claire came home, it all went better than anticipated.

Craig had a great set up

Wrote a great card

The pizza looked delicious – vegetarian !

He even scored this amazing banana /nutritionist themed balloon…


A video of her surprise can be seen here : IMG_6206

Happy Registered  Nutritionist Dietician Day Claire! Thanks Craig!